Hollywood tends to paint a really skew picture of what marriage is like. I mean, how much of an actual marriage can you honestly fit into a two-hour movie? Any married couple will be able to tell you that it is much harder work to keep a marriage healthy than they could have thought.
Living in this day and age doesn’t make it any easier. On the contrary, couples today are faced with more challenges than ever before.
The elephant in the room
With the invention of the smartphone, came the invention of the digital divide. Most people go to bed with their smartphones. It is that third wheel that keeps couples from spending some intimate time in their most private quarters. No longer is the bedroom a private space. Rather, it has become the headquarters for the final social status update.
The solution to the problem is by being selfish with your time with your spouse. The bedroom is a sacred space and no one, or nothing should be allowed to steal from the intimacy that is reserved for the bedroom.
You might find it difficult at first to let go of your device, but your marriage will be in a far better space if your attention isn’t divided between your spouse and the hundreds of friends on your social media networks.
Lack of communication
Again, the smartphone is at the root of the communication gap. Don’t get me wrong, it can be a tremendously helpful tool which can make your life so much easier, but it is abused. You can walk into any restaurant or sit in any meeting, and someone or everyone will be texting their hearts out.
Relationships aren’t built on emoji’s, but they thrive on raw emotion. This emotion can only be expressed through proper communication.
Learning how to communicate as a couple has become very difficult and where it used to be the norm, it is something that has to be intentional nowadays. Start with baby steps and make face-to-face communication a top priority in your marriage. Put the phones off and have some quality time together.
Freedom of choice
Statistics have shown that the number of marriages have gone down. It seems like millennials don’t necessarily view marriage as an essential part of becoming an adult anymore. Those who get married do so at a later stage, but at the slightest hint of inconvenience, they bail and get divorced and move on to the next thing, or person.
Getting married at a later stage in life isn’t a bad thing at all, at least you have the good sense to know what you want and what is valuable. In this sense, you should make sure that you are willing to stick to the vows that you make on your wedding day.
Infidelity isn’t new by any means, but the opportunities that we have to be unfaithful nowadays have increased. There are even sites that encourage discreet affairs and provide spouses with choices of people to sleep around with.
People get bored because they don’t put effort into their marriages anymore. Work and the daily stress of life take center stage and couples live past each other.
Before you know it, you only focus on the things your spouse does wrong. Instead, take a step back and start to focus on the 90% that your spouse is amazing at.
Priority, priority, priority
It’s no secret, we are busy, and it doesn’t look like things are going to slow down any time soon. Married couples tend to take each other for granted after a while and grow apart because the marriage isn’t the top priority anymore. Instead, careers, selfish ambitions, and even the kids become more important.
Make your marriage your top priority. Your spouse should always be your first love. If something else is stealing the limelight, get rid of it. Of course, you can’t just quit your job, but it doesn’t need to rule your life. In the end, time is what will either break your marriage apart or save it.